Daily Life & Living Together
The first 30 days: preventing a rematch
AuPair Connect — Équipe Conformité · Last updated 12 September 2026 · Reviewed by TSO
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Most rematches are decided in the first 30 days. A structured settling-in phase with short, regular check-ins turns a good start into a successful year. Here is the protocol to follow.
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Week 1 — setting the framework
The first week is about laying down landmarks, not optimising childcare. Take time to welcome, explain and observe before changing anything.
- Go through the house handbook, the schedule and the house rules together.
- Show the neighbourhood: school, stops, doctor, shops.
- Introduce the children with simple, repeated rituals.
- Book a 15-minute check-in every evening of the first week.
Weeks 2–3 — adjusting without judging
Habits form now. This is the moment to adjust operational details and hear the first difficulties before they settle in.
- Fix slots that do not hold, together and in writing.
- Ask explicitly what is difficult, not only whether “everything is fine”.
- Name what works: positive feedback consolidates good reflexes.
- Counter isolation: language classes, activities, local contacts.
Week 4 — the founding review
A formal review after one month, calm and without blame, defuses most tensions and corrects the course for the months ahead.
- Three questions: what is going well, what is stuck, what do we change?
- Re-adjust the schedule and tasks in writing if needed.
- Acknowledge wins on both sides, not only gaps.
- Set next goals together, including for the language.
Warning signals to take seriously
A rematch rarely appears overnight. The earlier a signal is named, the easier it is to handle. If difficulties persist, bring in a neutral third party.
- Withdrawal: less exchange, more time alone in the room.
- Repeated unaddressed complaints or tasks systematically avoided.
- Conflicts about hours that recur every week.
- Signs of burnout or isolation, for the au pair as much as the parents.
Prepared by AuPair Connect — Compliance Team
Every legal, tax or safety detail in this content is verified by the AuPair Connect Compliance Team against official sources and dated.
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